Ike & the like

Most Americans can't imagine what it's like to stare down the barrel of Hurricane Ike, now taking aim on the Texas Gulf Coast.

I know I can't.

Sure, I lived in southern New England when Gloria -- the most-hyped storm in history -- came ashore as a weak Category 2 hurricane just 20 miles south of my home in 1985. I remember walls shaking, trees falling, lights winking and the eerie calm of the eye passing overhead.

Compared to Ike, Gloria was a nursery rhyme.

Forecasters say that Ike will arrive on Galveston Island early tomorrow morning as a Category 3 hurricane. By the time it reaches the Houston metropolitan area, 40 miles inland, it may still pack a Category 2 wallop. Coastal communities are expecting a 20-foot storm surge, and some areas already are under water. Ike's cloud shield, edge-to-edge, measures a staggering 900 miles.

As I watch a different weather system drop rain outside my window, a thousand miles from Galveston, Ike is just another news story -- except that it'll interrupt 25% of America's oil-refining capacity, 20% of domestic oil production and 15% of our natural-gas production, not to mention the temporary shutdown (at least) of numerous big chemical plants.

So while I keep the people of Galveston and Houston in my thoughts, I'll be equally mindful of the storm's impact on our punch-drunk economy. We seem capable of absorbing these painful blows, provided they're thrown one at a time, but what'll we do if they start coming in flurries?

* * *

I should've bought gas last week.

I don't drive much these days, and I've let my tank (and my fuel cache) drift toward empty while watching prices fall. In just the last 24 hours, they've jumped by 20 cents a gallon around here.

Lazy, optimistic, and not terribly smart.

* * *

On Wednesday, Sen. Joe Biden said -- out loud and publicly -- that Sen. Hillary Clinton "might have been a better pick" for Sen. Barack Obama's running mate.

And yesterday, when asked by ABC's Charlie Gibson if she agrees with the "Bush Doctrine" -- the well-known policy of striking preemptively before being attacked -- Gov. Sarah Palin did her best impression of a moose in the headlights.

You just can't make this stuff up.

* * *

As I said on Wednesday, I've joined the ranks of the undecided, stepping back from my decision to vote for McCain-Palin. Reaction from readers, friends and family has been strong, to say the least, and overwhelmingly negative.

For the most part, I've been told that not voting for McCain-Palin would be "stupid" -- that's what we say, of course, about people who disagree with us. Democrats say it about Republicans. Conservatives say it about liberals. We have bookstores full of titles like Liberalism is a Mental Disorder, Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot, and If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans.

No wonder our country is stuck in reverse.

The 2008 presidential election will be my ninth, so I'm not exactly naive about the dynamics of a close race. I know that if I don't vote for McCain-Palin, I could be handing the equivalent of two votes to Obama-Biden -- especially significant in the so-called "battleground state" of Ohio, thanks to the Electoral College.

The McCain-Palin campaign's intellectual bankruptcy finally drove me to question the wisdom of casting a "defensive vote" against Obama-Biden, especially in light of my clear disagreement with the GOP ticket on issues like abortion rights, the U.S. occupation of Iraq and fiscal policy. I realized that I'd become part of an opposition flock of red sheep, and I'm not sure that's the best way for me to exercise my sacred privilege on November 4th.

If I do decide to vote for a minor-party candidate, I'd be leaving the flock in pursuit of a far greater good, as I perceive it, acknowledging that an Obama presidency isn't the most sinister threat to my country's future.

In terms of sentiment, I'd be standing with a majority of Americans who believe that the two dominant parties have broken more than they've fixed. In terms of action, however, I'd be decidedly in the minority, and frankly, that's a scary place to be. But as natural-gas wildcatter John Masters said,

"You have to recognize that every 'out-front' maneuver is going to be lonely. But if you feel entirely comfortable, then you're not far enough ahead to do any good. That warm sense of everything going well is usually the body temperature at the center of the herd. Only if you're far enough ahead to be at risk do you have a chance for large rewards."

(It occurs to me that political poseurs McCain-Palin and Obama-Biden might want to consult Mr. Masters before invoking buzzwords like "maverick" or "change.")

We need fundamental and revolutionary change, not the cosmetic, dime-store variety proposed by the two big campaigns. It won't happen in a single election, but it has to start somewhere.

It might as well start with me.

* * *

Less than 36 hours from now, my #5 Ohio State Buckeyes will play the top-ranked USC Trojans in the Los Angeles Coliseum.

OSU running back "Beanie" Wells, arguably the team's best player, is still nursing an injured foot and has been listed as "doubtful" for the game. USC presents enough of a challenge with Wells in the lineup, and if he's on the sidelines...

I'm going to end this post here -- it's damned near impossible to type with all my fingers crossed.

September 11, 2008

Today I touch the memory of ordinary lives and extraordinary bravery. It's a day to honor those who serve my community, my state, my nation.

It’s time to visit again the aching grief I felt seven years ago, to embrace my rage, and to shape anger into vigilance that guards my freedoms.

Whatever else I thought I needed to say can wait until tomorrow.

Today, I remember.

Reflection

Before I hit the pillow on this, the eve of the seventh anniversary of September 11th, 2001, I'll meditate on the words of Jean Jaurès:

"Take from the altars of the past the fire, not the ashes."

Never forget. Never forgive. Never surrender.

Makeup test

Ok, class, let's review.

Ad-libbed during her speech at the Republican National Convention and repeated countless times since then, Gov. Sarah "Hockey Mom" Palin has said,

"You know, they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick."

At a campaign event yesterday, Sen. Barack Obama said this about Gov. Palin's and Sen. John McCain's talk of "reforming" Washington:

"You can put lipstick on a pig -- it's still a pig. You can wrap an old fish in a piece of paper called 'change' -- it's still gonna stink."

Predictably, McCain-Palin surrogates -- and a stunningly large number of otherwise misogynistic conservatives -- are waxing apoplectic over Sen. Obama "playing the gender card."

Pull-eeze.

To start with, "putting lipstick on a pig" is a common colloquial expression, used often in political rhetoric to demean a proposal lacking credibility. Sen. McCain invoked it when he criticized Sen. Hillary Clinton's universal-healthcare plans.

Besides, the first to equate Gov. Palin to an ill-tempered quadruped wearing face paint was the Governor herself.

And to anyone who claims to be defending Gov. Palin's feminine honor, but who wouldn't have done likewise for Sen. Clinton: Sit down and shut up.

The longer Gov. Palin struts and frets upon our national stage, the clearer it becomes that Sen. McCain's choice of a running mate was a cynical one. That cynicism is well-founded, of course -- for proof, look no further than today's hot political topic.

The people now falling at the feet of Gov. Palin are the same ones who disparage others for joining Sen. Obama's "cult of personality" -- just as superficial, equally impressionable -- making Sen. McCain's cynical choice look positively brilliant.

Red or blue, sheep are sheep.

For me, the test is this: Do I want to be associated, in any way, with a mindless flock? I mean, I can tolerate the occasional insult to my intelligence, as partial payment for some greater good, but I have my limits.

I've said previously that I won't vote for the gun-grabbing, entitlement-happy Obama-Biden ticket, and I stand by that. I've also said that I favor, reluctantly and by default, McCain-Palin.

As of today, count me among the undecided. Somebody alert the pollsters.

I will vote on November 4th. And as much as I'd hate to squander this precious American right on a minor-party candidate with no shot at winning, I'm going to begin researching what I've been ignoring -- starting with Libertarian Party candidate Bob Barr.

Bugging: Now what?

One crisp morning many years ago, I was clambering about the scree above Glacier National Park's Lunch Creek Basin. Scanning the steep slopes, I spotted my photographic quarry -- an adult mountain goat and a pair of kids, perched impossibly on the side of a cliff.

I eased my knapsack off my shoulders, pulled out my trusted Canon and fitted a telephoto. Leaving the bag on a ledge, I moved slowly and quietly toward a better vantage point.

That's when my right foot slipped on a loose rock, putting me face-down in the alpine gravel. I began sliding, feet-first and untethered, down the slope. Reflexively, I went spread-eagle, halting the slide and avoiding what could've been a deadly fall.

It took me an excruciating hour to creep to relative safety, and still another hour to make my way back to my knapsack, a hundred yards away.

I never did get the shot.

The experience left me with my life and more than a few lessons -- chief among them my resolve to never again willingly separate myself from my gear.

But what if I'd found myself in a "Now what?" situation, whether unavoidably or through my own negligence, in the same kind of place and with the same assets? Inventory check: the clothes on my back, a pocketknife, cigarettes and paper matches, chewing gum, wristwatch, wallet, car keys and camera.

Moving down-slope, below the tree line and into the basin, I would've had access to snow and moving water that I could've collected in the camera body, the lens hood or even a boot. The alpine scrub offered pitch, tinder and fuel for a fire. Leaning cut boughs over a rock outcropping would've made for a tolerable shelter. My camera's lens might've been useful as a firestarter, a signaling device or a cutting tool. Being late summer, potentially edible creek-side vegetation was plentiful.

Despite being ill-equipped, I believe I could've survived.

When the SHTF, our only resources are the ones we have at-hand. Months of work stocking a TEOTWAWKI cache in the basement isn't much good if we're stuck in traffic miles away. That bug-out bag stashed in the trunk becomes useless the moment the car is stolen. Maybe we left our personal-defense handgun at home in the safe, because we never made the time to get a concealed-carry permit.

Spilled milk, that. The mission doesn't change. Survive.

Regardless of the situation, mindset is the key to survival. To reinforce that, the U.S. military has used the word SURVIVAL as a mnemonic device:

• Size up the situation
• Use all your senses, Undue haste makes waste
• Remember where you are
• Vanquish fear & panic
• Improvise
• Value living
• Act like the natives
• Live by your wits, Learn basic skills now

Interesting, isn't it, that there's no mention of gear? That's because having the ultimate stuff in a bag is a whole lot less important than having the right stuff between the ears.

Preparedness begins, then, with mindset and skills. After that, we can consider the kind of gear that increases our chances of survival -- along with the best ways to ensure that we have it when we need it.

On that Montana mountainside, I made the mistake of leaving behind some of the gear that would've been helpful in a survival situation, but I still had a knife in my pocket. To this day, I always carry a serviceable knife -- whether it's a basic pocketknife, a multi-tool, a big folder or a fixed blade, and airport security notwithstanding, it's simply not negotiable.

Sometimes, of course, becoming separated from a well-stocked fanny pack or knapsack can't be helped, so I've learned to appreciate the value of carrying a minimal kit in my pocket whenever I head into the woods.

I highly recommend the Field & Stream article on building a simple kit that fits in an Altoids tin. Assembling such a kit is guaranteed to make you feel like a kid again, especially if you involve kids in the project. For some of the more unusual items, by the way, I've found Best Glide Aviation Survival Equipment to be a reliable source.

Back in 2004, then-Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said,

"You have to go to war with the army you have, not the army you want."

That assertion may have plunged Sec. Rumsfeld deep into hot water, but for those of us engaged in preparing ourselves and our families to survive under less-than-ideal circumstances, the principle is worth remembering.

Because when the worst happens, it's not about having what we need -- it's about using what we have. The mission doesn't change. Survive.

Bugging: Bag it

Without question, the most important tool in any survival situation is the brain -- and fortunately for most of us, it comes permanently attached in its own handy carrying case. Sooner or later, however, we come to understand that preparedness also involves other tools and supplies, and that means finding a way to carry stuff.

Yesterday's post suggested a model for a family-size bug-out box, something that would be hauled in a vehicle. This installment will deal with the personal, more portable bug-out bag.

Besides being durable and comfortable to carry, a bug-out bag needs to allow quick and convenient access to its contents -- I'm talking about a smart layout of pockets and compartments. And ideally, whatever its size, a bug-out bag will be big enough to accommodate:

• Water, or the ability to gather & purify water
• Food, or the ability to gather & prepare food
• Shelter & warmth, or the ability to create shelter & warmth
• Tools
• First aid & medical
• Communications
• Defense

It's possible, of course, to carry the bare essentials in something as small as an Altoids tin, and I have several personal kits packed into wide-mouth Nalgene bottles and small belt packs. A big fanny pack, like my well-traveled North Face model, is another good choice for toting a kit.

I'd like to offer a few more options -- three bags that work, in different ways, for me.

Maxpedition Jumbo Versipack
With carrying capacity equivalent to a large fanny pack, the Maxpedition Jumbo Versipack (retail $89) is a cross-torso shoulder-slung design. It's stout, water-resistant and offers plenty of zippered pockets accessible without opening the 216-cubic-inch main compartment.

One of the things that sets this bag apart is a clever "slip compartment" that rides next to the body, designed to conceal a firearm for quick strong-side draw or weak-side cross-draw. I suggest adding the simple and inexpensive Maxpedition Universal CCW Holster for the sake of safety and consistency, and then practicing with the arrangement.

(If you need a refresher on why armed personal defense should be a preparedness consideration, please go back and read "Cold, cold water.")

The Jumbo Versipack is the kind of bag I can pack with bug-out (or bug-home) essentials and leave in the trunk of my car, but it's friendly enough to use as an every-day "man bag." (Sorry.) It's a certified winner, and when funds allow, I intend to make the Jumbo Versipack the standard grab'n'go pack for each member of my family.

'Cheaper Than Dirt' MOLLE Backpack
Some of us remember Karl Malden saying, "Don't leave home without it," and took the suggestion maybe a bit too seriously.

Well, fellow packrats, rejoice -- the MOLLE Assault Backpack (retail $50) from Cheaper Than Dirt was made for us.

("MOLLE," by the way, stands for "Modular Lightweight Load-carrying Equipment.")

Is this the highest-quality backpack available? No, not even close -- but as a high-capacity, pack-it-and-forget-it bag, it might be the best value I've seen. It's respectably well-made and features a dizzying array of pockets and compartments. The grid of PALS (Pouch Attachment Ladder System) webbing on the pack's exterior means that it can be tailored to individual needs with add-on pouches, even a hydration carrier.

For me, the bug-out role of a fully stocked CTD MOLLE Assault Backpack would be to support an overland trek from our shelter-in-place base. I'd also be inclined to toss it in the trunk of my car before heading out for longer than a day, especially during the winter months.

Maratac Briefcase
When the SHTF, some of us we won't be bugging out, and we won't be bugging home. We'll be bugging to work.

Law-enforcement, emergency-management and disaster-relief personnel have entirely different requirements in a bag. It might need to carry "bail-out" tactical gear, maps and grid schematics, a notebook computer or a mobile-communications setup. For those and similar roles, the Maratac "Force Multiplier Bag" (retail $69) from CountyComm would be a worthy choice.

Fundamentally, the Maratac is an oversize, overbuilt fabric briefcase with typical briefcase features. Three of the outside panels are covered in PALS webbing, accommodating a range of modular pouches. The interior is fitted with a stiff divider, covered in loop (as in hook-and-loop, or Velcro®) material that allows flexible placement of, for example, a concealed firearm and magazines.

The wide, padded shoulder strap doesn't make the Maratac a candidate for wilderness travel, but for its intended purpose, it definitely fills the bill.

Touché

"Attention Sarah Palin: Jesus was a community organizer -- Pontius Pilate was a governor." (seen on a t-shirt)

Bugging: ShelterBox

Whether it's family preparedness, personal defense or other tasks, I'm a big fan of "modeling" -- looking for good ideas and then applying or adapting them to whatever I'm trying to accomplish. It's an approach that ends the search for a single answer, in favor of assimilating a range of wisdom into a custom solution.

On the subject of preparedness, there's no shortage of information and advice on the WWWeb. Despite that, I've noticed that some folks have trouble putting together a compact, portable store of disaster supplies.

For anyone intimidated by the prospect of assembling a family bug-out kit, I suggest modeling something called a ShelterBox.

The concept was developed by a Rotarian and former Royal Navy search-and-rescue diver as a way to deliver essential materials (sans food and water) to victims of disasters around the globe. Now an international charity funded through donations, the ShelterBox organization has become one of the most effective aid agencies in the world.

A ShelterBox, which serves up to ten people, comprises:

• One 49-gallon box, the delivery container; later, it can be used to store water, food, etc.
• One ten-person tent.
• Ten insulated vinyl sleeping mats & lightweight thermal blankets.
• Ten envelope-type sleeping bags.
• 180 water-purification tablets (enough for up to three months).
• One collapsible 5-gallon water container & two collapsible 2.1-gallon water carriers.
• Collapsible trenching shovel.
• 164 feet of rope.
• Repellent-treated mosquito netting.
• Ten PVC ponchos.
• Tools (hatchet, knife, screwdriver, hammer, pliers, saw, hoe head, etc.).
• Multi-fuel stove.
• Cookware, dinnerware & utensils.
• Children's activity kit (simple school supplies, stickers & coloring book).

Even though a ShelterBox doesn't include necessary consumables, look at it as a model -- and then try to tell me it's impossible to assemble an all-inclusive, 72-hour family bug-out kit because it won't fit in an SUV or sedan.

I contend that a typical American family of four could gather materials equivalent to a ShelterBox, plus provisions for food, first aid and defense, into the same space or less, packing sufficient water separately. It's easy, really.

(If at this point you're wondering if the ShelterBox people will sell you one of these kits already assembled, you've completely missed the point. You're probably prime refugee material, and you should find another blog to read.)

Sunday bits

This morning, Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson announced what we'd all been expecting -- the federal government will take over Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, the two giants holding half of all U.S. mortgages.

That the bailout was inevitable is beyond dispute. That it'll stabilize the mortgage markets and ease 30-year rates is open to question. Any claim that this move came in time to halt our nation's downward economic spiral is dubious at best.

Here's what's certain: We, the taxpaying public and our taxpaying children, will bear the consequences.

* * *

The Ohio State University hasn't lost a football game to another Ohio school since Oberlin bested the Buckeyes 7-6 in 1921.

Against Ohio University yesterday, lord knows they tried.

Those guys in green and white -- y'know, the ones that weren't even recruited by the scarlet and gray -- brought their attitude to The 'Shoe and sent the Buckeyes a message.

Message received -- and eventually returned to sender, 26-14, relieving me of having to explain how arguably the most talented team in the country blew a gimme.

Elsewhere, it wasn't a good Saturday for another football fan in our household -- my wife's beloved West Virginia Mountaineers lost to East Carolina, 24-3.

I've since been assured that this gridiron collapse was my fault. When we left for Hineygate yesterday morning, apparently I didn't allow Mrs. KintlaLake enough time to find the WVU good-luck necklace she always wears under her OSU garb.

Okay...

* * *

With all due respect, NASCAR Nation can keep its hydrophobic, go-fast-turn-left brand of motorsports. I'll take rain-or-shine, road-course racing -- every time.

I especially love waking up early on Sunday mornings to watch Formula One, and today's Belgian Grand Prix at Spa-Francorchamps reminded me why.

Ferrari’s Kimi "Iceman" Räikkönen, defending F1 champion, dominated the race from its second lap. Young Lewis Hamilton of McLaren, the series points leader going into Belgium, recovered from an early spin to dog Räikkönen from P2 throughout.

Then, with eight laps to go, rain began falling on parts of the four-mile course. Räikkönen got conservative and his two-second advantage over the more aggressive Hamilton evaporated. The pair swapped the lead several times during the last two laps, but Räikkönen was unable to match the Englishman's purpose and spun twice on the slippery surface, the second time into a barrier, ending his day. Hamilton tiptoed around the skating rink to take the checkered flag.

Absolutely spectacular motor racing.

A few hours after the race, F1 stewards assessed Hamilton a 25-second penalty for cutting a chicane during his closing-laps tussle with Räikkönen, bumping the McLaren pilot from first to third. Disappointing as that must be for the Brit, his team and his fans, it doesn't erase my memory of one of the most exciting finishes I've seen in years.

There's nothing wrong, of course, with preferring NASCAR's Sprint Cup series -- as a matter of fact, the green flag just dropped on this week's race at Richmond International Raceway.

It was scheduled to run yesterday, but hey, it was raining in Virginia...

Stretch run

This morning we awoke to a world without big political conventions -- and what a glorious world it is.

Looking back at the parties' parties, the Democrats survived the PUMAs and emerged with something close to the unity they sought. Although not to my political tastes and far from perfect, it was, by any credible measure, an extraordinarily well-produced and successful event. Grade: A-.

Note to the DNC: Good show. No more silly-ass columns.

The Republican National Convention, however, may well be hoist by its own petard. Its minimalist set and low-key stagecraft, ostensibly for the purpose of making the Democrats look overly gaudy by comparison, did nothing to contribute excitement to the festivities -- and creating excitement, really, is the whole point of a convention.

That left the job to speakers and other players. With the exception of Gov. Sarah Palin and possibly Mayor Rudy Giuliani, none delivered. Grade: C.

Now, as the campaign enters its final 60 days, the big, bad, "elitist liberal media" are reporting on a number of unforced errors committed by the GOP in St. Paul.

I'm sure you've heard that as a high-school basketball star, Gov. Palin earned the nickname "Sarah Barracuda." Naturally, I suppose, Republicans decided to play the 1977 hit "Barracuda" by the rock group Heart at every opportunity during the convention -- without permission, as it turns out, prompting this statement from Heart's Ann and Nancy Wilson:

"Sarah Palin's views and values in NO WAY represent us as American women. We ask that our song 'Barracuda' no longer be used to promote her image. The song 'Barracuda' was written in the late '70s as a scathing rant against the soulless, corporate nature of the music business, particularly for women. (The 'barracuda' represented the business.) While Heart did not and would not authorize the use of their song at the RNC, there's irony in Republican strategists' choice to make use of it there."

Ouch, babe.

On Monday evening, Mrs. KintlaLake and I watched Cindy McCain and First Lady Laura Bush speak on the convention's unofficial "Hurricane Gustav Day." I remember my wife wondering aloud about the designer of Ms. McCain's striking dress.

Seems Vanity Fair was curious, too, and promptly put its research team on the case. Naming the designer, Oscar de la Renta, wasn't the half of it, though -- according to the magazine, the estimated price tag of dress, shoes, watch and necklace was a whopping $20,000.

People just like us, eh?

There's more: including her three-carat diamond earrings, the total came to more than $300,000.

Look, it's the McCains' hard-earned money and they have every right to spend it as they like, but this sort of extravagance is colossally bad form on the campaign trail. It's not something the Obama campaign will mention, however -- both because they shouldn't and because they won't have to.

And then there's the inexplicable matter of a certain image that appeared on the big screen behind Sen. John McCain's acceptance speech on Thursday.

First, the camera went to a tight shot, setting Sen. McCain against a field of green -- just like that cheesy green background in Louisiana a few months ago.

It may sound like the teleproduction equivalent of inside baseball, but green is bad and this was a mistake -- a repeat mistake, this time with the highest of stakes.

When the camera went wide again, I saw that the green field actually was a lawn in front of an elegant stone building. At the time, the first thing that occurred to me -- Why are they showing a photo of some big, fancy villa? -- made absolutely no sense, especially after the lamentable seven-homes flap.

I shook my head and turned my attention back to the speech. It wasn't until today that I got, as Paul Harvey would say, the rest of the story.

The building isn't a villa at all -- it's Walter Reed Middle School in North Hollywood, California. (Nice digs, kids.)

Wait a minute -- could it be (as many today are speculating) that some junior McCain staffer was asked to find a photo of Walter Reed Army Medical Center and picked a junior high instead?

The McCain campaign says no, this was exactly the photo they wanted -- a schoolhouse with a flag and a porch, typical postcard Americana.

I don't believe that for a second.

Adding insult to self-inflicted injury, Walter Reed Middle School has issued a statement saying that the RNC didn't have permission to use the image to promote Sen. McCain's candidacy.

Sound familiar?

Unforced errors kill more campaigns than do October surprises engineered by the opposition. If McCain-Palin can't eliminate the screwups, they're going to fade into also-ran status.

As it is, they're already making me feel unwell about casting my vote in their direction.

One forgettable

Well, there went an hour I'll never get back.

Sen. John McCain will never join the ranks of great American political orators -- everyone knows that, including the Senator himself. But tonight we saw what happens when third-rate delivery meets wretched speechwriting.

It was hard to watch.

The address wasn't so much boring as it was fractured and thin. That's the fault of the speechwriter, not the speaker. Not even a Fred Thompson or a Barack Obama could've saved this one.

Oh, it had its moments. Like when Sen. McCain took his fellow Washington insiders to the rhetorical woodshed for losing the public's trust. Or all those lines that implied, "Nice platform, people, but remember: I'm a maverick."

Or when he ad-libbed while security dragged a Code Pink protester out of the arena.

To the extent that there was substance, it took the form of familiar GOP chestnuts. Points made on economic issues put the nominee in a hard-about -- back toward failed Bush policies and opposite the best interest of the McCain-Palin ticket. Not good.

Of course, whenever Sen. McCain talks about his stay at the Hanoi Hilton, told with particular poignancy tonight, it's always compelling. And the finish -- "Stand up!" -- was strong, at least.

But no, this was a speech best forgotten -- fire up the Straight Talk Express, hit the road for Wisconsin and leave tonight in the rearview mirror. Shred the paper copies, bulk the tapes and erase the memory (digital and otherwise). Save the stills of the balloons and families.

By the way, Senator -- nice haircut.

All-nighter

This morning, it's easy to spot Republicans -- they're the ones with bags under their eyes and black-and-blue cheeks.

They've been up all night, basking in the glow of Gov. Sarah Palin's speech and pinching themselves silly.

The GOP discovered the cure for its long-denied Obama-envy in a young conservative star with an almost messianic ability to attract, communicate and inspire. In a single evening, Gov. Palin leveled the political playing field.

Well, maybe.

Taking a critical look at Gov. Palin's performance, in context, diminishes neither its excellence nor its significance. As citizens, in fact, it's our responsibility to scrutinize the deeds and words of those who aspire to our nation's highest office.

For months now, Republicans and opposition Democrats have been dismissive of Sen. Barack Obama's charisma and oratory. He gives a good speech, they say. After last night, and until we learn more, Gov. Palin can just as easily be dismissed. Well, she gives a good speech.

So much for that talking point.

Her ability to energize a partisan hall also shouldn't be mistaken for mass appeal, at least not until she proves it on the campaign trail. Centrists and teetering Democrats are crucial to Sen. John McCain's chances in November, but cheers at the Republican National Convention don't demonstrate that she can reach beyond the party's base.

That isn't to say she won't, simply that this one speech doesn't prove that she can.

Since Sen. McCain announced his choice of Gov. Palin a week ago, much has been made of the media's persistent search for actual substance about an admittedly unknown quantity -- which is exactly what I want a free press to do. An army of well-paid surrogates have cried unfair and even sexist, but so far they've avoided answering what I consider perfectly reasonable questions.

Personally, I want the press to keep pressing. Gov. Palin's speech, rousing as it was, answered virtually none of my substantive questions. Eventually she'll have to come out from behind the teleprompter and meet the media head-on, and that's when I expect to learn something useful.

Radical as it may sound, I want to cast an informed vote, not merely an inspired one.

Stepping back from critiquing Gov. Palin for a moment, it's worth noting that three of the four candidates on the major parties' tickets -- Sen. Obama, Sen. Joe Biden and Gov. Palin -- came from relatively humble roots. Only Sen. McCain, born into an elite military family, had anything resembling a head-start in life, but his sacrifice as a prisoner-of-war pulls him back toward the simple hearts and mean circumstances of many Americans.

So each of these candidates is, in some way, emotionally and ideologically accessible to ordinary citizens. A bond of identity can be forged with any of them, and most voters will decide based on which bond feels strongest.

More than anything else, that's what Gov. Palin's speech accomplished -- it gave her an identity within reach of the American voter. In that way, she definitely leveled the playing field.

Ultimately, it was a great night for her and a great night for the Republican Party. And we got our drama.

Game on.

Hey, chum!
Yesterday's session of the Republican Convention reminded me of a Gallagher act -- with one difference.

Gallagher fans wear ponchos; these Republicans wallowed gleefully in everything thrown from the stage.

Don't get me wrong here -- I know that red-meat rhetoric and sixth-grade sarcasm are the stock-in-trade of party conventions. Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney did his part, albeit without any particular skill or resonance. Former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani, on the other hand, proved once again that he's a master of the art.

Mayor Giuliani crossed a line, however, and later, so did Gov. Palin. I fully expect Republicans to question Sen. Obama's experience, but I expect them to do it without childishly belittling "community organizers" -- this from the party that abhors "big government" and encourages the concept of citizen-servants.

In mocking community organizers, Republicans mocked themselves. It wasn't just unbecoming -- it was arrogant and insulting.

Unexpected debut
When Sen. McCain arrived in Minnesota yesterday afternoon, he was greeted on the tarmac by the entire Palin clan -- including its newest member, 18-year-old Levi Johnston, reportedly the father of Bristol Palin's unborn child. Sen. McCain lingered with the couple for a few moments, no doubt saying, "Hang in there" at some point.

It was an interesting decision, both by the family and by the campaign, to bring the young Mr. Johnston into the light. Parading him within the cameras' view doesn't completely negate "private family matter," but it sure does strain the argument.

An invitation
To former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee: If you drink beer, I'd like to have one with you -- as long as we don't have to say grace first.

I'll close this post with a touching story that Gov. Huckabee wove into his speech last night.

On the first day of school in 2005, Martha Cothren, a teacher at Joe T. Robinson High School in Little Rock, was determined that her students would not take their education or their privilege as Americans for granted. With the principal's permission, she removed all the desks from her classroom.

The students entered the empty room and asked, "Mrs. Cothren, where are our desks?"

"You get a desk when you tell me how you earn it," she replied.

"Making good grades?" asked one student.

"You ought to make good grades, but that won't get you a desk," Martha responded.

"I guess we have to behave," offered another.

"You will behave in my class," Mrs. Cothren retorted, "but that won't get you a desk, either."

No one in first period guessed right. Same for second period.

By lunch, the buzz was all over campus...Mrs. Cothren had flipped out...wouldn't let her students have a desk. Kids had used their cell phones and called their parents.

By early afternoon, all four of the local network TV affiliates had camera crews at the school to report on the teacher who wouldn't let her students have a desk unless they could tell her how they earned it. By the final period, no one had guessed correctly.

As the students filed in, Martha Cothren said, "Well, I didn't think you would figure it out, so I'll have to tell you."

Martha opened the door of her classroom. In walked 27 veterans, some wearing uniforms from years gone by, but each one carrying a school desk.

As they carefully and quietly arranged the desks in neat rows, Martha said, "You don't have to earn your desks. These guys already did.

"They went halfway around the world, giving up their education and interrupting their careers and families so you could have the freedom you have.

"No one charged you for your desk. But it wasn't really free. These guys bought it for you. And I hope you never forget it."

Home run

Gov. Sarah Palin touched 'em all tonight.

We didn't learn anything, really, about whether or not she's got what it takes to be Vice President, but she did (with plenty of professional help, to be sure) exactly what she needed to do.

Good for her. Good for us? Time will tell.

Quote of the Day

"She's going to have to be like that business in the 'Superman' movie where the little Superbaby was traveling through space and they're giving him a tape of all the knowledge in the world for him to absorb." (Ben Stein, on preparing Gov. Sarah Palin for the campaign)

On Day Two, Day One

Confident that Hurricane Gustav had cleared both the Gulf Coast and the national headlines, the Republican Party gave itself permission to kick off its 2008 nominating convention late yesterday.



It's interesting to compare the atmospherics of this convention to the one held by Democrats last week. The venue is smaller and simpler -- intimate, even sparse, perhaps an attempt to play against public perception of Republicans as big-money fat cats. The backdrop is a huge video screen which, when it's not showing other images, is occupied by a single U.S. flag waving in the wind against a clear blue sky.

Patriotism is on proud display, and in typical GOP fashion -- which is to say, old-fashioned. It's conventional, "Country First" love of postcard America. Likewise the incorporation of religion -- unapologetically and exclusively Christian.

The assembled crowd is overwhelmingly white, in contrast to the Democrats' more apparent diversity. As expected, the haircuts are better. Funny hats abound, but I didn't see any rainbow flags or gay-pride banners. (Natch.)

And damn, these people are serious. Purposeful, stern, even scowling faces were everywhere.

Among the highlights of last night's program was a patriotic video narrated by actor Robert Duvall. A series of images -- Lincoln, the founding fathers, Mt. Rushmore, anonymous Americans in military service, and latter-day Republican icons -- flashed across the screen. Predictably, the partisans roared over pictures of former Pres. Ronald Reagan and wife Nancy, as they did for former First Lady Barbara Bush, Pres. George W. Bush, and soon-to-be-nominee Sen. John McCain.

Notably, however, when a photo of civil-rights hero Rosa Parks appeared on the big screen, I heard no reaction at all. Not long after that, the presentation showed an image of Martin Luther King, Jr., as he was being booked into jail -- and I heard an audible groan from the crowd.

If a white guy in Ohio, an independent, caught that...I'm just sayin'...

First Lady Laura Bush delivered an uncharacteristically political speech to introduce her husband, who appeared via video from the White House. The program moved quickly (and not accidentally) into another video before former Sen. Fred Thompson stepped to the convention podium.

Welcome back, Fred -- we've missed you.

A year or so ago, I'd had high hopes for Sen. Thompson and fully expected to cast a vote for him. His approach to federalism has my personal endorsement, and despite my fundamental disagreement with him on issues like abortion, his was a candidacy I believed I could get behind. His run fell flat, of course, but it was good seeing him again.

The last speaker to take the stage was once my U.S. Senator, Democrat-turned-independent-turned-McCain-supporter Sen. Joe Lieberman. This was a novelty act staged not so much to inspire Republicans as to piss off Democrats -- and it will, but its real effect, I think, is greatly overrated.

That said, I still want to call attention to a couple of paragraphs from Sen. Lieberman's remarks:

"Our founding fathers foresaw the danger of...senseless partisanship. George Washington himself -- in his Farewell Address to our country -- warned that the 'spirit of party' is 'the worst enemy' of our democracy and 'enfeebles' our government's ability to do its job.

"George Washington was absolutely right. The sad truth is -- today we are living through his worst nightmare, in the capital city that bears his name."

Of all the words spoken at yesterday's session, those may have been the most important.

Tonight the national spotlight will glare on Gov. Sarah Palin. I'll make the popcorn.

Now, a few peripheral observations.

'It's people like you wot cause unrest'
Well, you'll have that. With apologies to John Mellencamp, "Ain't that America?"

'Pas de Dupes' redux
As if to reinforce a point I made yesterday, senior McCain adviser and former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina offered this response to criticism of Gov. Palin's lack of experience:

"Because of Hillary Clinton's historic run for the Presidency and the treatment she received, American women are more highly tuned than ever to recognize and decry sexism in all its forms. They will not tolerate sexist treatment of Governor Palin."

Ok, let's review: Questioning Gov. Palin's experience is sexist, but questioning Sen. Barack Obama's experience isn't racist.

Got it.

And if I'm not sitting there...?
In a repeat performance of the stunningly elitist remarks that forced his resignation in July as a McCain adviser, former Sen. Phil Gramm said this at a Financial Services Roundtable yesterday in Minneapolis:

"If you're sitting here today, you're not economically illiterate and you're not a whiner, so I'm not worried about who you're going to vote for."

Even if this guy already quit once, can Sen. McCain make him resign again?

Suppose they threw a party
Across the river from the Republican National Convention, a reported 15,000 people gathered for another political event -- the Rally for the Republic, organized by supporters of former Republican candidate Rep. Ron Paul. Keynote speakers included Rep. Paul, journalist Tucker Carlson, former Minnesota Gov. Jesse Ventura and Grover Norquist of Americans for Tax Reform.

Anyone who followed the Republican primaries is familiar with the libertarian views and peculiar temperament of Rep. Paul and his disciples. And while he's not presidential material -- not by a long shot -- this kind of grassroots energy is a crucial part of fixing our broken government.

Wish I'd been there.

Pas de Dupes

Not long ago, Sen. John McCain's campaign mantra was, "It's about experience."

"Nonsense," came the familiar reply from Sen. Barack Obama's campaign. "It's all about judgment."

Then Sen. Obama named Sen. Joe Biden as his running mate, touting -- you guessed it -- his 36 years' experience in the U.S. Senate.

Last Friday, after picking Gov. Sarah Palin, the McCain campaign was forced to downplay her insubstantial résumé -- suddenly, it's her judgment that matters.

It's as if the campaigns got together, swapped talking points and kept going. Over the last few days, it's been especially embarrassing to watch talking heads for the Republican ticket, doing their best Vinnie Barbarino, pretending that no one remembers months of strident criticism of Sen. Obama's lack of experience -- both by Sen. McCain and, during the primaries, by Sen. Hillary Clinton.

If the contradictions are so obvious, then, how can the campaigns expect us to buy what they're selling?

Because we do -- every time.

Most of us are under the spell of party affiliation or crippled by ideology. We ascribe credibility based on whether an (R) or a (D) appears beneath the moving image. When one of those mechanized surrogates pops up in front of us, we listen carefully to how they're introduced -- "conservative," "liberal," or "supporter of."

As long as it's someone who shares our ideology, it doesn't matter if their rhetoric insults any reasonable person's intelligence -- we remain numb to it. When someone with the "wrong" philosophy says something that (heaven forbid) actually makes sense, we're deaf to it.

What the hell is wrong with us?

More than ever before, this year's presidential campaign is a grand dance for fools, and we're all invited -- but don't blame the candidates for hosting the ball. They're in the business of doing what works, and history has shown that blatant manipulation works just fine on our simple-minded electorate.

Maybe it's best if we just stop thinking about it -- after all, that's what we do best.

The candidates, in fact, are counting on it.

Fair game?

According to a statement issued today by Gov. Sarah Palin and her husband, Todd, their 17-year-old daughter, Bristol, is pregnant. The young woman plans to keep the baby and marry the father.

So, does this have any relevance whatsoever to the presidential campaign? No. Is it a private family matter? Yes.

To his credit, Sen. Barack Obama, himself the child of a teenage mother, has declared the subject "off limits." Smart, classy, correct.

Now, should we condemn the media for reporting the story and discussing the topic? Absolutely not.

Like it or not, this is news. And considering Gov. Palin's wish to be seen as a social conservative -- including standing for abstinence (however one does that) and against sex education in public schools -- it's news with more than a touch of irony. Of course, that doesn't stop some McCain-Palin supporters from waxing indignant.

Please, people, I'm beggin' you -- get over this media-as-root-of-all-evil thing and, while you're at it, get over yourselves.

As for claims that Gov. Palin's 4-month-old son, Trig, isn't the Governor's child but daughter Bristol's, that yellow trash is being "reported" by gutter-scraping blogs and like-minded conspiracy theorists. As far as I know, the story has no basis in fact.

Then again, neither do reports that Sen. Obama is Muslim (etc., etc.) -- and speaking of irony, some of the folks complaining loudest about the Palin baby-laundering story are the same people who help perpetuate equally baseless claims about the opposition.

Slime attracts slime. Just desserts and all that. It's a great country.

The real, relevant issue here is whether or not Sen. John McCain's reportedly impulsive choice was subjected to the proper "vetting."

Being a maverick is one thing, but being hoodwinked -- or, worse, doing the hoodwinking -- is quite another. That, it seems to me, is where the media should focus its attention.

Party crashed

Hurricane Gustav, just now making landfall on the Gulf Coast, came ashore late yesterday in St. Paul, Minnesota, prompting a statement from the Republican National Convention:

"At the recommendation of Sen. John McCain, the 2008 Republican National Convention announced substantial changes to the convention's program and actions being taken to help with Hurricane Gustav relief efforts. On Monday, all program activities beyond the official business that must be conducted in accordance with party rules will be cancelled."

Rick Davis, campaign manager for Sen. John McCain, elaborated:

"We are deeply concerned about the safety and welfare of the residents of the Gulf State region. Our top priority is to assist those who will be affected by Hurricane Gustav. This is not a time for politics or celebration; it is a time for us to come together as Americans and assist the residents of the Gulf States."

"At some point between Monday and Thursday evening, we will convene once again to complete the activities needed to qualify Senator McCain and Governor Palin for the ballot in all 50 states. Beyond that, all we can say is that we will monitor what is happening and make decisions about other convention business as details become available."

It's the right move -- and, for a whole slew of reasons, a transparent one.

Without questioning the expression of concern for Americans in Gustav's path, no doubt the RNC was motivated by the prospect of split-screen images of balloons on one side and disaster scenes on the other. And right or wrong, thanks to the Bush administration's ineptitude, Republicans are most closely identified with the Katrina fiasco.

The GOP, then, like a repentant adulterer, is wise not to invite the inevitable criticism. Better to do some partisan penance.

Beyond the potential for bad press is the very real potential for relatively little press -- Gustav coverage dominating page one and the convention being relegated to page two (or worse). That could've made the Republicans' party seem comparatively insignificant and the Republican Party appear even more out of touch than it's already perceived to be.

Although it remains to be seen if McCain-Palin will suffer without the traditional final-night introduction to American voters -- and that still may happen -- the ticket might actually benefit from a scaled-back event.

Let's face it, any time McCain-Palin can distance itself from the dismally unpopular Bush-Cheney administration, it's a win. With the President's and Vice President's convention speeches cancelled (both were scheduled to speak today), it's the political equivalent of found money for the GOP.

Ultimately, and speaking for myself here, these big political conventions inform my voting decision about as much as a Super Bowl halftime show -- entertaining as they are, historic as they can be, I wouldn't mourn the loss of this one.

September's eve

August has been a chunky month. As it comes to a close, a few thoughts.

Gustav gusting
My wife once lived on Louisiana's Gulf Coast. It's no surprise, then, that she's been keeping a close eye on Hurricane Gustav and exchanging e-mails with friends in New Orleans and Houston.

Like most Americans, I lack Mrs. KintlaLake's personal connection to this imminent natural disaster, so I've been watching local, state and federal attempts to avoid repeating Katrina mistakes. I've also noticed some residents' inflated sense of entitlement to government aid in preparing for and evacuating from the storm.

Some of us remember one particularly disturbing after-effect of Katrina -- the City of New Orleans seizing more than a thousand firearms from law-abiding citizens, guns that weren't part of any criminal investigation.

The city's reckless violation of Second Amendment rights left these citizens unarmed in the face of roving gangs, home invaders and other criminals. The National Rifle Association has filed a lawsuit against Mayor Ray Nagin and Police Superintendent Warren Riley.

As compassionate Americans, we hold the residents of the Gulf Coast in our hearts as Gustav approaches.

To Mayor Nagin and Supt. Riley: We'll be watching.

Sarah Palin
In the interest of fairness, I haven't yet seen how well Gov. Palin handles the pressure-cooker that is national politics. Fortunately for her, she has 65 days to show us what she's got -- besides her gender, ultra-conservative ideology and featherweight résumé, anyway. Unfortunately for those of us who like to apply independent critical thought to such things, 65 days probably isn't enough time.

Let's be honest about one thing, though -- viewing Sen. John McCain's choice of Gov. Palin as anything but a fourth-quarter "hail Mary" at this point is symptomatic of a serious Kool-Aid overdose.

Republican convention
For obvious reasons, the "disunity" angle was all the buzz during last week's Democratic convention. Republicans, set to meet this week, have their own problems, of course.

Sen. McCain, whose support among humorless conservatives had been hanging by the proverbial thread, apparently reinforced the tether by selecting Gov. Palin. Thing is, his choice exposed another fracture: "scorecard conservatives" vs. rank-and-file Republicans.

The former, litmus paper in-hand, labor under the delusion that they can win elections all by themselves. The latter know that a pristine conservative ticket has virtually no chance of succeeding, so they forgo right-wing idealism in favor of a relatively conservative alternative -- and a shot at a Republican win in November.

At the other political extreme, pure liberal ideology doesn't suffer from conservatives' delusion -- it's the difference between exclusivity (conservative) and inclusion (liberal). Big-tent liberal ideology dilutes identity, however, something that today's sheepish electorate craves. As a result, inclusion is a strategy that doesn't reliably deliver election-day wins -- even when it should.

In any case, this week's Republican convention has potential for true drama and divisiveness, albeit with better haircuts, real diamonds, more expensive suits and probably less weeping.

Pander-off
I despise watching politicians suck up to voters -- unless they're sucking up to me, that is.

After announcing their engagement in Dayton on Friday, Sen. McCain and Gov. Palin dropped by the Buckeye Corner on Lane Avenue in Columbus. He bought an armload of Buckeye shirts and other trinkets, and she bought an Ohio State cheerleader outfit for her young daughter.

Isn’t that just precious? Score!

Late yesterday, the Obama-Biden ticket held a rally in the Columbus suburb of Dublin -- wisely, well after Ohio State's game with Youngstown State. After congratulating the Buckeyes on their 43-0 victory, Sen. Barack Obama shouted into the microphone, "O-H!"

Immediately, 19,000 voices responded as one, "I-O!" The antiphonal chant between candidate and crowd was repeated twice more.

In these parts, you can win a lot of votes by pandering to OSU fans, but anyone can swipe a credit card. It takes a professional suckup to lead a cheer.

Advantage: Obama.