Saturday, May 7, 2011

'Tommy this, an' Tommy that'

Since Sunday night, naturally we've been getting more information -- I hesitate to say details -- about the assault that resulted in the assassination of Osama bin Laden.

There was a firefight; um, there really wasn't a firefight. The target was unarmed; he was reaching for a weapon; well, he might've been reaching for a weapon. He didn't indicate his wish to surrender; actually, he wasn't given an opportunity to surrender.

None of that matters -- not to me. With apologies to Ghostbusters:
We came, we saw, we kicked his ass.
In the analysis that's followed, we've heard the sort of second-guessing we've come to expect from pundits and elected officials who have neither the standing nor the experience to offer intelligent comment. Ideologues from the left quote Yoda or misquote MLK, suggesting either that we shouldn't celebrate the death of the butcherous bin Laden or that he should've been captured and tried. Right-wingers misquote Samuel Clemens or George Orwell while (at best) damning the Commander-in-Chief with faint praise.

Neither extreme strays far from unfiltered ignorance. And both, ultimately, pile insult on the men and women -- from commanders to warriors to those "who only stand and wait" -- who sacrifice much and risk all to defend our freedom.

Over a century ago, Kipling gave voice to the warfighter's bitterness at ungrateful countrymen. I'll close with the classic tribute.


Tommy
by Rudyard Kipling (1892)


I went into a public-'ouse to get a pint o' beer,
The publican 'e up an' sez, "We serve no red-coats here."
The girls be'ind the bar they laughed an' giggled fit to die,
I outs into the street again an' to myself sez I:

O it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, go away";
But it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins", when the band begins to play,
The band begins to play, my boys, the band begins to play,
O it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins", when the band begins to play.


I went into a theatre as sober as could be,
They gave a drunk civilian room, but 'adn't none for me;
They sent me to the gallery or round the music-'alls,
But when it comes to fightin', Lord! they'll shove me in the stalls!

For it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, wait outside";
But it's "Special train for Atkins" when the trooper's on the tide,
The troopship's on the tide, my boys, the troopship's on the tide,
O it's "Special train for Atkins" when the trooper's on the tide.


Yes, makin' mock o' uniforms that guard you while you sleep
Is cheaper than them uniforms, an' they're starvation cheap;
An' hustlin' drunken soldiers when they're goin' large a bit
Is five times better business than paradin' in full kit.

Then it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, 'ow's yer soul?"
But it's "Thin red line of 'eroes" when the drums begin to roll,
The drums begin to roll, my boys, the drums begin to roll,
O it's "Thin red line of 'eroes" when the drums begin to roll.


We aren't no thin red 'eroes, nor we aren't no blackguards too,
But single men in barricks, most remarkable like you;
An' if sometimes our conduck isn't all your fancy paints,
Why, single men in barricks don't grow into plaster saints;

While it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, fall be'ind",
But it's "Please to walk in front, sir", when there's trouble in the wind
There's trouble in the wind, my boys, there's trouble in the wind,
O it's "Please to walk in front, sir", when there's trouble in the wind.


You talk o' better food for us, an' schools, an' fires, an' all:
We'll wait for extry rations if you treat us rational.
Don't mess about the cook-room slops, but prove it to our face
The Widow's Uniform is not the soldier-man's disgrace.

For it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Chuck him out, the brute!"
But it's "Saviour of 'is country" when the guns begin to shoot;
An' it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' anything you please;
An' Tommy ain't a bloomin' fool -- you bet that Tommy sees!