The bad news is that the same media can't fill 24 hours with Sen. John McCain and Sen. Barack Obama alone, so most of the political yammering we hear comes not from the candidates themselves, but from an army of paid strategists, professional surrogates and programmed supporters. It's "death by talking points," and it's not at all pretty.
Some of these mouthpieces are more appealing than others, or at least more tolerable, while a few practically beg us to run screaming from the room. Here, in my opinion, are the most annoying of an annoying breed.
(And no, James Carville isn't on the list.)
#5 - Mark PennStrategist for Sen. Hillary Clinton
Mr. Penn's on-camera appearances were rarer than other Clinton surrogates', but during the primary season he was largely responsible for what they said. Widely regarded as the Democrats' version of Karl Rove, his take-no-prisoners tactics nearly crippled his party. Not my cup of latte.
#4 - Tucker BoundsSpokesperson for McCain-Palin
To be the go-to talking head for a major presidential campaign at the tender age of 29 is quite an accomplishment -- unfortunately, Mr. Bounds lacks the chops to pull it off with any credibility. Clearly out of his depth, he puts my cringe reflex into a full-on cramp in 30 seconds or less. Come back in 2016, Mr. Bounds.
#3 - Nancy PfontenhauerSenior adviser to McCain-Palin
One by one, Sen. McCain's spokespersons are falling from favor, and these days Ms. Pfontenhauer is in the barrel. With no knack for disagreeing without being disagreeable, the statuesque surrogate always seems to level an implicit "You idiot!" at her opposition. Stop already. Click.
#2 - Lanny DavisSurrogate for Sen. Hillary Clinton
Mr. Davis needs neither an introduction nor any help practicing political pyromania. During the last primaries, he peddled scorched earth with vigor and glee, a reminder of what's wrong with our politics. His fading from the national scene is a blessing, and should he someday reappear on my Sony, his immediate disappearance is assured.
#1 - Sarah PalinWay-overexposed hockey mom
No contest here. Dick Vitale may still be the best argument for the MUTE button, but Gov. Palin is the best reason to memorize the location of the nearest fire escape. I've been watching her populist-pabulum act for about six weeks now and I've had entirely enough -- I mean, Tina Fey isn't the only one who's tired. I think my sock drawer needs attention.
