Friday, September 4, 2009

But do you need it?

I know what you're thinking.

Please, not another post about his orange Griptilian.

Relax, click on that photo and look closely -- it's a new Benchmade 551, this time fitted with blades of "highly corrosion-resistant" X-15 T.N stainless steel. Otherwise, it appears to be essentially identical to other 551 Griptilians.

What surprises me most about the
551-H2O is the price -- $120, just 20 bucks more than the 154CM version. A quick check of street prices seems to indicate that the increase in MSRP translates into a $13 bump (to about $76) in the real world. Not bad.

In concept, this looks like a good upgrade, certainly a bargain. Obviously, I don't need one -- but do you?

I guess that depends.

Forget claims of collectability and the intangible CDI factor. It's like this: if you're in the habit of using a folding knife around salt water, then you might benefit from the 551-H20's additional resistance to corrosion, so go for it.

For us landlubbers, though, Benchmade's 154CM variant probably is plenty cool enough.

Every Monster energy drink I've ever tried reminds me, in one way or another, of cough syrup. And like most medicine, Monster is overpriced and, when used as directed, does the job.

It kicks my ass, every time.

Still, I have a hard time justifying the price tag -- or I did, until the Java Monster line was introduced.

I like all eight flavors, but by far my favorite is Russian Java Monster. Not only does it taste all grown up, it puts me in the mood to clean baseboards and ceiling fans and the clear plastic that covers the speedometer on my truck and -- hey Sparky, wanna go play in the creek? What day is it, anyway?

Let's face it, you want a jolt like that every now and then. But really now, do you need it?

Of course you do. Now quit stalling and just hold the ladder while I...